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It has been 5 months since our daughter was born. I didn’t think we would get to this place back in the beginning...5 months out? It seemed a lifetime away.

I am here and I can't help feeling that there is something wrong with my body that she didn’t live; That I couldn’t stop her from dying.

I'm in this weird place where I feel like she died because she's better off that way than alive, with me. Twisted, I convince myself I wouldn’t be a good parent. I couldn’t handle parenting.